Fat — текст песни (Weird Al Yankovic)

Fat
[Bad/Michael Jackson/1986]

Your butt is wide, well mine is too.
Just watch your mouth, or I`ll sit on you.
The word is out, better treat me right,
Cause I`m the king of cellulite.
Ham on ham on ham on whole wheat, all right.

My zippers bust, my buckles break.
I`m too much man for you to take.
The pavement cracks when I fall down.
I`ve got more chins than Chinatown.

Well I`ve never used a phone booth,
And I`ve never seen my toes.
When I`m goin` to the movies
I take up seven rows.

Don`tcha call me pudgy, portly or stout.
Just tell me once again: Who`s fat?

When I walk out to get my mail,
It measures on the Richter scale.
Down at the beach I`m a lucky man.
I`m the only one who gets a tan.
If I have one more pie a la mode
I`m gonna need my own zip code.

When you`re only having seconds,
I`m having twenty-thirds.
When I go to get my shoes shined,
I gotta take their word.

And my shadow weighs forty-two pounds.
Lemme tell you once again who`s fat.

If you see me comin` your way,
Better give me plenty space.
If I tell you that I`m hungry,
Then won`t you feed my face.

Woo woo woo. When I sit around the house,
I really sit around the house.

And you know all by myself I`m a crowd.
Lemme tell you once again.

You know I`m huge, I`m fat, you know it.
And the whole world knoes I`m fat and I`m proud.