Uncle Bernie`s Farm — текст песни (Frank Zappa)

Ray Collins (vocals)
Jimmy Carl Black (drums)
Billy Mundi (drums)
Roy Estrada (bass)
Don Preston (keyboards)
Bunk Gardner (woodwinds)
Motorhead Sherwood (soprano, baritone saxophone)

(I`m dreaming...)

There`s a bomb to blow yo mommy up,
A bomb for yo daddy too! (Ouch!)
A baby doll that burps `n pees;
A case of airplane glue!
There`s a hungry plastic troll,
To scarf yo buddy`s arm!
There`s a box of ugly plastic things marked:
"UNCLE BERNIE`S FARM"

There`s a little plastic `CONGRESS`
There`s a `NATION` you can buy!
There`s a doll that looks like mommy
(She`ll do anything but cry) (Yes, Sir)
There`s a doll that looks like daddy
(He`s a funny little man...
Push a button `n ask fo money:
There`s a dollar in his hand!) (Check his wallet)

We gotta send Sanny claus back to de Rescue Mission!
Christmas don`t make it no more!
Don`tcha know that murder an` destruction
Scream de toys in every store! (I think this is sold in New York)

There`s a man who runs the country
There`s a man who tried to think
And they`re all made out of plastic
(When they melt, they start to stink)
There`s a book with smiling children,
Nearly dead with Christmas joys
And smiling in his office
is the creep who makes `the toys`
(They got this car, when it hits the wall, you can see the guy dying
You got little plastic pools of blood
Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho (I`m dreaming...)
...intestines...you can see right into his stomach...
There`s this other thing, I...
I got bombs, I got rockets, I got a, I got a stillson wrench
and comes with a tape recorder...
I got plastic brass knuckles
with sound effects
We got a `39 Chevy...